Ok so all I had to do was keep a secret for 14 days let’s see if your as clever as my daughter!
Me: “oh remind me to pack more than 1 swim suit this time”
Thomas “pack for where? Are you going somewhere?”
Me: “oh I mean when we do swimming lessons then all welcome”
Jess “well that won’t be for ages so we will probably forget”
2 days later
Me “yeah your car can go on the drive while we’re away”
10-20 minutes later I hang up
Jess “are we going away?”
Me “no what made you say that?”
Jess “you told granny she can put her car on the drive while you are away”
Me “in Jan when we go to Italy and you stay with granny”
Wednesday first week
Me “that’s ok we will see you next Sunday we can sort it out before then”
Hang up shortly after
Jess “is granny coming over?”
Me “yep next Sunday”
Later same day
Jess talking to granny as they do from time to time on loud speaker
Jess “will it be ready for next week”
Granny “no but you can help me next week I am sure we will get it done before we go home”
Me “I’m not so sure mum one night is hard going”
Mum “one night I thought it was 3 nights?”
Emily” yay granny is staying for 3 nights”
Mum “we can sit and do it on the beach”
Kids “are we going to a sandy beach?”
Me “yes we are going out for the day to the beach Monday that’s why granny is staying Sunday night so we can leave early”
Me whole kids are messing around refusing to clean their rooms up.” if you don’t get your washing downstairs then we won’t be able to pack! And you will be left behind”
Tom “why do we need to pack”
Me “because I er Emily get down from there before you fall”
Jess “are we going away mummy?”
Me “yes I thought it would be nice for granny if we stayed with her for a few days after”
Talking to Duncan
Me “the wiper motor hasn’t turned up yet do you think we should just book her in to have it replaced? ”
Duncan” I don’t know”
Me “well otherwise we could find ourselves stuck not being able to get there or back again if it rains”
I go upstairs
Jess “how will granny get her car back?”
Me : “you what?”
Monday (7 days into it)
Jess “granny’s coming Sunday?”
Jess “then we are going to the beach Monday early and staying until late heading to granny’s house from the beach?”
Me without thinking “yes that’s right”
Jess “so how will granny get her car back as it will be here”
Me “we will bring her back for it later in the week”
Jess won’t she need it?
Me: no she won’t need it because she will be in our car with us
Jess: so why does granny need livvy to feed her cats if we’re going to be there?
Me: that’s Sunday and Monday not all week
Wednesday (only 5 days to keep the secret)
Jess: mum you’re a rubbish liar
Me:what makes you say that?
Jess: because you are
Erm ok then nothing more said
Wednesday evening duncan is putting wiper motor in car on the drive
Duncan: have you told the kids
Me: no why
Duncan: because Thomas mentioned going away
Thomas walks out the house followed by jess Em is in bed at this point
Me: oh didn’t I tell you we are heading to granny’s for a few days
I go inside tom follows
Thomas: what’s wrong with granny’s car couldn’t daddy fix it?
Me: granny’s car?
Tom: well granny’s car is staying here while we go to hers is it because we have a mechanic and granny doesn’t is she borrowing ours?
Me : oh right yes that’s right daddy’s work man is going to fix it for her
Jess and I are tidying the kitchen from breakfast Thomas is upstairs with Emily cleaning their teeth.
Jess: you’re such a rubbish liar mum, we’re going on holiday aren’t we?
Me: no and where do you think I will get the money for that?
Jess: it’s ok i have told Thomas and Emily that granny needed her car fixing so we are taking her home after the beach and staying at hers till the car is fixed then she is returning home with us. You and granny really are rubbish at lying.
Me: what makes you think we are going on holiday what you are saying is what will be happening
Jess: it’s not because livvy put on FB that she couldn’t meet with a friend till later because she was looking after her granny’s cat all week so where ever we are going granny’s coming too!
Me: oh dear well your right but don’t tell daddy or we won’t be going anywhere it was meant to be a secret
Jess: so where are we going?
Me: sigh not even I know that daddy didn’t say
Jess: hmm (with a suspicious look on her face)